Divine pattern in marriage 3
by Ivan Ho 16 May 2025
Many think that marriage is about finding someone who will give one Attention, Affection, Affirmation, Approval..i.e. things surrounding self in which God isn’t involved. One would spend his or her whole life looking for a ‘soul mate‘ who will fulfill the needs in his or her soul. People look for soulmates to complete what’s lacking in their souls, thinking that their “other half” are sent by God to complete them, and often end up being disillusioned.
The fact of the matter is, many marriages would end in divorce because one or both parties realise that their personalities don’t match and therefore conclude that “they are not made for each other”. The word of God never provides for “incompatibility in personality” as a ground for divorce.
When God created Adam, He took from his rib and created the woman and brought her to the man. Notice that the woman wasn’t taken from his soul but from his flesh.
And the LORD God caused a deep sleep to fall upon Adam, and he slept: and he took one of his ribs, and closed up the flesh instead thereof; and the rib, which the LORD God had taken from man, made he a woman, and brought her unto the man. And Adam said, This is now bone of my bones, and flesh of my flesh: she shall be called Woman, because she was taken out of Man. Therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother, and shall cleave unto his wife: and they shall be one flesh.
In other words, Eve was given her own soul and spirit from God. She has her own unique personality. The whole business about soul matching isn’t Biblical. When the man and the woman are married, “the two shall become one flesh” (not one soul). Gen 2:24
Instead the bible says: “Two cannot walk together unless they agree” (Amos 3:3). In other words, there must be Agreement between the man and the woman to walk together in the same pathway and purpose given by God despite any differences in personality and preferences.